The consulting call began as a business strategy session, but quickly turned into a bigger conversation about finding a North Star.

Allow me to back up and explain the framework I use to avoid analysis paralysis and move through feelings of being stuck.

A few years ago—a time when my business was wildly changing, motherhood reached a new peak, and I was running on all cylinders—I needed a way to align big-picture dreams with small daily decisions.

Have you ever felt drained by making huge decisions with very little information on an imperative timeline?

THAT WAS THE STORY OF MY LIFE 24/7.

I needed a way to quickly sift through the important decisions to keep me aligned to my big goals.

I began by asking myself what I wanted.

I wish I could say that it hit me like a lightning bolt, but in the beginning, I sat with my pen, completely dumbstruck that I couldn’t actually find an answer.

I wanted everything. I wanted nothing. I wanted it all. I wanted a fresh loaf of sourdough bread and fresh butter. I wanted to not be gluten free.

Since the exercise wasn’t leading anywhere productive, I decided to simply write down a desire when I saw or imagined it.

(For example, I saw Leila Hormozi post a job listing for a Content Strategist, so I added it to my list…my neighbor hired a professional organizer for her kitchen, so I added it to my list… an influencer on Instagram had her manicurist do her nails for an at-home appointment, so I added it to my list, etc.)

Sometimes I wrote one thing a day, other times it was 10 things. The goal was just to get into the habit of defining what I wanted.

After a couple of weeks, I had a pile of Wants, but what did I actually Want?

I began to look for patterns between each entry and soon enough I clearly saw what I desperately wanted: TIME.

Everything I wanted to do/have/buy was to get more time.

Soon I realized it wasn’t about optimizing for extra minutes, but for extra moments that truly mattered to me.

What I wanted was to build a business and life that empowered me to have more time (quality time, presence, not just mere hours added to my day) for two main reasons: 1. creativity; and 2. my family.

Once I identified what I truly wanted, I titled it, My North Star.

Every decision I soon began to make was supposed to get my closer—not further—from My North Star.

Should I sign that contract? Should I extend into a new offer? Should I make that investment?

If it wasn’t pointing me to My North Star, I wasn’t doing it.

I explained this process to my consulting client, and said I believed she was stuck because she didn’t know what she wanted.

She was smart, talented, hard-working, and successful…she wasn’t stuck, she simply didn’t have a North Star to guide her decisions.

As you navigate your life and business today, I hope you take time to define your North Star.

It’ll help guide your decisions to what matters most, what you want, and support your definition of success.

In fact, today on >>my podcast<<, I explained how/why I invested to attend a Founder’s Retreat in Austin, Texas (and gave behind-the-scenes access to what transpired).

It was a mastermind-style event that empowered me to step into a creative form of leadership, as well as give me time with my family since we traveled together.

I hope you define what you Want…and it’s an honor to support your journey along the way.

Your fan,

j*

The post Can I Ask: What Do You Actually WANT? appeared first on Jasmine Star.

Cost of time, focus, pleasure.

Many of us want the outcome of the success—the dream—but few calculate the cost, only later to decide if it was too expensive.

Have you considered how long it will take? How much time it will take from your days, weeks, years? Have you counted how much patience it will require?

Have you committed to doing less because your dream will demand that you do more of the new thing and less of what you’re doing now?

Will you say NO to Netflix&Chill and YES to Network&Consistent? Will you chose Happy Lifetime instead of Happy Hour?

Because the price of the life you want will cost you your current one.

You might bypass a vacation this year so you can save and invest in yourself NOW so you have a future filled with more vacations for longer periods, if that’s what you wish.

What if the price tag is trading in your Hummer for a Honda…or your Honda for a used Hyundai…and saving that extra money for your business? What if changing your cost of living is the key to your success?

Could you downsize for a few years so you can place strategic bets on YOUR future…what I really mean is place bets on YOURSELF.

To be clear, I wouldn’t suggest doing something I haven’t done myself. Not because I’m strong and determined, but because my future vision is empowering me to make present sacrifices.

The cost of late nights, early mornings, long afternoons, short months. The cost of delayed trips, bypassed networking events, and saying no to binge watching The Diplomat.

But I calculated the price tag of our dream before I began.

And I continue to CHOOSE to acknowledge and accept the cost because I deeply believe the investment for my future is worth the discomfort of today. I believe in my future. And—if I might be so cheesy—I believe in YOU.

I believe that if you know the cost of your dream before you begin, you won’t find yourself negotiating with yourself once you begin.

• I’ll start next week, next month, next year.
• I’ll wait to post it.
• I’ll release it when I know it’s right.
• Maybe I wasn’t supposed to start.
• I must be doing it wrong. Maybe it’s not meant to be.
• I don’t think it should take this long.
• Maybe I just can’t do it.

Those thoughts? That’s negotiating.

These words aren’t reasons for you to stop, they are excuses why you won’t continue.

Please stop negotiating the price. You will have to pay full price for your dream. But it’ll be worth it.

When you say yes—and you don’t stop moving forward—living the hardest day in your dream life is better than the easiest year in the discounted version of everything you wanted.

So now my question for you is: Will you count the cost of your dream. And—more importantly—will you pay it?

I believe in you,

j*

The post You Can Afford More than You’ve Been Lead to Believe appeared first on Jasmine Star.

As one who loves to celebrate love, I posted the following on social media:

@jdstar it’s our 20th anniversary When we took our vows, they were the most important words to us.

But that’s what they were: words.

Promises take on an entirely new meaning when they become actions.

“TO LOVE, HONOR, CHERISH TIL DEATH DO US PART…”

Warm, home cooked dinners, long mornings sipping coffee together, orchestrating a perfect playlist feels like LOVE.

When you push me into bigger rooms, ask for my advice, and include me in all decisions feels like HONOR.

Planning family date nights, all of us reading in bed, and us holding hands in the ocean are moments we CHERISH.

You are the pure embodiment of love in action, not just words.

Last night you asked me if I’d want to do another 20 years by your side, and I responded I wanted another 200.

Feliz aniversario mi amor.

(Thank you to our five year old daughter for taking our photo YOU MUST TAKE AFTER YOUR MOTHER BABY GIRL )

— … — … — … —

After I posted that on social media, I realized that wasn’t really true. Or at least not fully encompassing of the truth.

It felt too perfect. And the trip? It was anything but perfect.

So I posted this on Instagram the following day:

Cheers to your shadows and success,

j*

The post The (non)reality of Social Media appeared first on Jasmine Star.

It’s for the following reason: The life you want is just beyond your current situation.

It’s calling out to you, begging to keep going.

It’s asking you to make changes TODAY so you get results tomorrow.

It’s requiring you to stick.to.the.plan.

Your future life is reminding you to do what other people won’t, to get results other people will never have.

What you want is on the other side of consistency, so this note? It’s a reminder.

Do what needs to be done today so tomorrow is everything you imagined.

AND MORE.

With intention,

j*

The post This is the Reminder U Didn’t Know U Needed appeared first on Jasmine Star.

As an entrepreneur, I didn’t think I’d homeschool my daughter, but—alas—life had other plans.

My husband (and business partner) and I decided to enroll Luna into a homeschool co-op, where she’ll attend class for a few hours a day, and we’ll supplement the rest at home.

It feels very granola, crunchy, hippie meets Joanna Gaines of the OC, but I’m trying my best to understand the new world of drop-offs, packed lunches, and being the “Room Parent.”

HOW WAS I NOMINATED AS ROOM PARENT WHEN I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS??

Last I heard, it means I get to collect money from other parents and throw parties for kindergarteners.

Now that I think about it, IT’S THE PERFECT ROLE FOR ME (move over Joanna, I’m armed with a glue gun and an Amazon cart full of decor!).

While I’m very much trying to learn the ropes, last week we dropped Luna off for her first day of school.

I was so full of emotion that I wrote her a letter, something that I needed, also, to read myself.

I’m sharing it with you in case you—like me—need a reminder.

— —

Dear Luna,

Today was your first day of school, and I wanted to throw myself in front of the door to kindergarten and tell you all the reasons not to go in.

Instead, you grabbed my hand and said you were scared.

Behind my sunglasses, I cried and thought to myself, “Me too, baby girl, me too.”

In that way, you’re my greatest teacher.

Where I want to throw myself in opposition, you continue to bravely take tiny steps forward.

I’m quite certain the things I whispered to you as we walked into school are the same things I’ll spend the rest of my life repeating into your ear:

• You choose bravery.
• You always find the positive.
• You don’t believe in failure.
• You never give up.

The best (and worst) thing about being your mom is watching you grow up, and realizing how fast time is dancing by.

I want to hold on, to pull back, and refuse to let go, but you show me what it is to always choose adventure, creativity, and determination.

Thank you for showing me how to continually choose bravery, positivity, and never giving up.

Love,

Mama

— —

I hope that today you choose to make brave decisions, find positivity, and refuse to give up.

Your Joanna Gaines-wannabe,

j*

The post I Was Nominated for WHAT?? appeared first on Jasmine Star.

It was last-minute, a thousand details conspiring to get me to the islands of Hawaii, each beckoning like sirens at sea.

JD told me—as my husband and business partner—he wanted me to get away and find the new version of myself.

In order for the business to expand, he said, you must expand your energetic capacity first.

And so I left.

I found myself on the quiet island of Lanai, at a health and wellness center, where I spent my days in the quiet of my mind, asking what to leave behind in my next chapter.

The irony is that while the business has been growing and an unmistakable success, it’s also been a series of staggering lessons.

Here’s a brief synopsis of the last 27 months…

Have you been in a rough spot lately? Reply to this note because the team and I would love remind you that you’re not alone.

Lift your chin,

j*

P.S. Wanna see something new? I created a video diary (no, really, it’s a no-makeup, messy bun reveal) at the step-by-step process of building my new sales department and team…you don’t wanna miss it >>HERE<<.

The post They Didn’t Think I’d Show This appeared first on Jasmine Star.

My friend wasn’t talking about sports, he was talking about life.

(To be clear, no one talks to me about sports because when I run it looks like I’m dragging a frozen turkey on my ankle, while pumping jazz hands at my sides.  Coincidentally, as a kid, I was always last picked for kickball.)

If life was a game of baseball, I’d be known for swinging my bat.  A lot.

And missing.  (I think they call it “whiffing”.)

My jersey wouldn’t have my last name on the back, it’d simply read: MS. WHIFFER.

I’ve whiffed more than I’ve hit.

And while I wish it wasn’t the case, I wouldn’t change anything.  Missing has taught me more than hitting a grand slam ever could.

(If you’re wondering when I’ll drop this baseball analogy, oh baby I’M JUST GETTING STARTED so take a bite of your Dodger dog because we ain’t stretching until the 7th inning!)

I once heard a story about a kid who had the chance to hit a pitch in Yankee stadium, a life-long dream of his.  Standing in a line of kids, he was told that everyone had a chance to hit.

He watched as the kids in front of him swung, missed, and walked out of the batter’s box.

When his time arrived, he stepped to the plate and ball whizzed right past him.  He shook his head, and waited for the next pitch.

Sailed right past him again.

The kids in line started complaining about how long he was taking, but he simply shook his head.

He yelled to the pitcher, “I’m going to stand here until I get a hit, so send something good my way!”

All these years later, I can’t forget that story.  What audacity.  To stand, wait, and trust you’ll get a hit when the time is right.

As a child, I wanted his audacity.  As an adult, I claim it.

I’ve chosen to stand in life’s batter box and wait until I get my hit.  It’s not easy, but if I strike out, I’ll be happier having taken a swing and missing, than never moving my bat at all.

I hope the same for you.

Life gives you more than three strikes,

j*

P.S. As summer ends, we’re spending as much time by the pool as possible…what’s your favorite end of summer tradition? I’d love to hear from you.

The post Can’t believe his AUDACITY! appeared first on Jasmine Star.

What happened behind-the-scenes: I pitched myself (more on that in the coming months!), I offered to pay for the bill, then I realized I LEFT MY WALLET ON THE PLANE.

What I posted online: Masterminding with incredible entrepreneurs in Chicago as we scale our businesses.

What happened behind-the-scenes: I felt like an imposter, battled anxiety, and faced some sad/heavy news with my family.

What I posted online: Hanging out with my daughter once I returned from Chicago.

What happened behind-the-scenes: Having a conversation with my husband/business partner about not wanting to travel without him and Luna…I don’t want to build without us at each others’ sides.

There’s so much that happens behind the scenes.

Things we won’t share publicly, things in the messy middle, things without a controllable solution.

But that’s not just business, it’s life.

Building requires us to flip between the idyllic, idiosyncratic, and idiotic mere seconds of each other.

I’ve—slowly—realized that the best way to remain grounded is by way of GRATITUDE.

I’m grateful for:

• The flight attendant who turned my wallet into Lost & Found.
• Friends who accept me as I am, and encourage my insights and feedback.
• Family who holds me up, and pushes me on.
• You, being here…journeying with me.

I’d love to connect with you and get to know what you’re grateful for today.

Respond and let me know. I want to be grateful with you.

To life behind the scenes,

j*

P.S. SOOO excited to share this verrrry behind-the-scenes conversation with PopFlex/Blogilates Founder, Cassey Ho, >>HERE<< on my podcast today. From self-funding an 8-figure business, to online haters, and building a business on her creativity…it’s a banger.

The post Can I Show You Behind-the-Scenes of My Biz? appeared first on Jasmine Star.

JD and Luna brought the dirty penny home.

My husband said the penny looked different. Yea, it’s black, I replied.

Ignoring my daftness, he poured vinegar into a cup and dropped the penny in.

(PLEASE DON’T ASK ME HOW HE KNEW TO DO THIS, AS HE CLAIMS “EVERYBODY” KNOWS VINEGAR CLEANS COPPER…)

He scrubbed the penny and asked me if I noticed a tiny letter under the mint year (1979).

Letter? I see a tiny gold fish, I said.

So I went to my internet Auntie who knows everything (a.k.a. Instagram) and asked if people saw the “D” my husband insisted was there.

Not only did most people see the “D” I got a message from Danielle:

So—of course—I had to share the news because Danielle also sent me another link…

She sent me a link to an eBay listing…

You saw that right…the penny is worth a LOT more than just one cent.

And it got me thinking: What’s sitting in front of us—perhaps covered in the years of neglect—that’s worth a lot more than face value?

• What skill do you have that you claim isn’t special?
• What can you teach that you think anyone can?
• What experience can you share that helps others?
• Maybe you need to show people how to clean pennies with vinegar?!

No, really, what skill of yours is hidden in plain sight that you wish other people saw?

Respond to this note, please.

I want to see your shine, I want to know what’s hidden in plain sight.

Mostly, I want to remind you that your value may be a LOT more than what people may think.

Lucky Pennies, j*

P.S. Speaking of value we sometimes can’t see, today I dropped a special podcast: What I Did in Quarter 2 Review. It shares who I met with, what I tested, things I built, the meetings I had, and the pitched I pitched. The good, bad, and oh-so-awkward. Click >>HERE<<.

The post I Found $1,200 on the Street appeared first on Jasmine Star.